Week 4: Waiting for It

The hives steadily progressed up my wife’s arm. I found some antibiotics in the medicine cabinet and that seemed to slow the advancement a bit... or perhaps it was just wishful thinking. Other options to prevent the turning were discussed, such as amputating the arm. They either didn’t work or in the case of amputation, I was too much of a coward to go through with it.

We made plans for how to handle things when she turned, then we decided not to talk about anything related to it again. We spent our time trying to enjoy each other’s company, avoiding the obvious and pretty much just waiting for it. I wish I could say they were happy times; that we made the most of it but it doesn’t happen like that in real life.

When someone is dying, it is hard to remember the good times. Instead you spend all your time thinking about death while trying to distract the person that is dying from their own thoughts of death. Add to that my missing son and you can imagine what a dark depression it was.  Regardless I wouldn't give up a single minute I had left to spend with my wife and I am grateful for every second we had together.

I still stand by my decision not to abandon her and go find our son.